Perfectly said

Legacy Of An Adopted Child

Once there were two women

Who never knew each other.

One you do not remember, the other you call mother.

Two different lives shaped to make yours one.

One became your guiding star, the other became your sun.

The first gave you life

And the second taught you to live it.

The first gave you a need for love

And the second was there to give it.

One gave you a nationality, the other gave you a name.

One gave you a seed of talent, 

The other gave you an aim.

One gave emotions,

And the other calmed your fears.

One saw your first sweet smile,

The other dried your tears.

One gave you up-

It was all that she could do.

The other prayed for a child

And God led her straight to you.

And now you ask me

Through your tears,

The age-old question

Through the years:

Heredity or environment

Which are you the product of?

Neither, my darling-

Neither,

Just two kinds of love.

A coworker had this up on my locker one day from a newspaper clipping. It pretty much made me cry. I thought it was perfectly said and really touched me. I just had to share it! 

Key West

I know I have been blogging a lot about our "baby stuff" and realized I hadn't posted on our latest trip to Key West earlier this year. We had a little shorter stay than normal when we go places but we had a GREAT time and the weather was perfect!!! We needed some palm trees back in our life;)

The life of a bird

The pier was packed full

Mallory square

Everyone trying to get a sunset picture.lol

Never know what you are going to see in Key West

My new ride?!

On our way back to the hotel

Sunrise one morning.....I think I might have liked the sunrises more than sunsets in the keys

Free breakfast next to the beach thanks to our coupon;) I have to take pics. of everything, even the food!  

They had an awesome pool

Donuts left over from our donut game

My favorite restaurant in Key West

Such a neat atmosphere

Nap time

Ahhhh

I love steel drums! This guy was really cool and came here all the way from Grenada.

Checking out our nice ride. lol

I couldn't wait to have the key lime pie on a stick. I had one at Seaside, FL and fell in love!!

Smile

Fort Zachary Taylor State Park

Where is Jarod??

Who new you could recieve a PhD at Beer School  

Our room was sooo cute. We stayed at the Sounthernmost Hotel our last night.

I know why a pic. of the shower...I loved the tile work:)

How cute!!!

Love

One of my favorite drinks the Pain Killer!

And..........KEY LIME PIE. hehe

Torn in the Middle

Over the past week I have thought A LOT about what to do since we were unable to do our FET.  I was so emotional those first couple days after hearing our news. I can say, I am torn right down the middle. I have researched some on adoption and watched videos crying. What a wonderful gift to receive. As well as a gift to give a home and so much love to a special child. However, I still have thoughts about possibly doing another IVF. I know before I have said, I didn't know if I would want to do anymore treatments. I just feel like my heart may be leaning a little more towards doing IVF. I think..... do I want to put my body through all of that again?! I thought I was done but those thoughts and feelings keep coming back on trying IVF. I know we are going to wait a few months before we decide on what we want to do. I sometimes wish we could get pregnant like almost everyone else.... if it was just a little simpler. I just have to keep praying for continued guidance through our journey.

Not Again

Well, here goes. I have been putting this off because I just didn't know where or how to start. As you know everything was looking GREAT! We ended up staying the night in Indy since we had to be at the center at 7:00 am Thursday. And, went to bed with me saying, this may be the last night just the two of us. The only thing is right before we were getting ready to leave and just after we said our prayer together. My phone rings. I thought maybe they were calling to give us a different time. Nope. They were calling to say, NEITHER of our embryos made it through the thaw! WHAT?? My heart sank and I just started crying! I knew there was a chance of this happening but never did I think to BOTH of our embryos! We were soooo ready too!! At that time it felt like it wasn't real and we were going to wake up. But that was reality!

I am so heartbroken about this and really don't know what to think. There is always something that has to go wrong....I wish I knew why it ALWAYS happens so much to us. I am trying to get through this but I am taking it harder than I thought! I so wish I was giving good news on here but unfortunately I'm not! I will update a little more later....

Getting so close

I know I had left off talking about doing our FET in the beginning of March. Well, we will be doing it THURSDAY!!!! We are getting so excited! All of our preparing is becoming a reality again. We will have 2 little embryos in my belly hopefully settling in. It is such an amazing feeling. I don't even know how to explain it. It brings tears to my eyes.

I debated about doing accupuncture as we had talked about letting things "fall in place". But last week I called and went in. I figured since this may be our last FET/IVF it wouldn't hurt. The lady that did mine was wonderful. She even said, she could tell I had little stress. That was great to know because I thought I was staying pretty stress free but then I didn't know if that was just me telling myself that. Lol. I know this is the first time as long as we have been doing tests/treatments that I feel at ease. I know if we do not become pregnant I will be heartbroken.  But I will know we did what we could. We actually did more than I ever thought we would do. I truly thought we would be pregnant by now. We are not and infertility has been one of the hardest things I have dealt with. It makes life so much more precious though!!

To hopefully new beginnings this week:)